Help
by gracey97
Summary: Ellie Lawson has had a life full of hurt and misery, so when she wakes up one evening to find that she is alone in a cold and damp street, how will she react? And when an ED nurse finds her, will she tell her about her past life? Or will it be a secret that stays secret?
1. Jess

It was just another day for me. I'd got used to the pain and had learnt how to hide it; after all, if I let it show they would only make it worse.

My body was covered in bruises and blood, and scars both old and new. My head throbbed and once again I knew it wouldn't be long until I blacked out. I suppose it didn't help living like I did, but there was nothing I could about it. My parents were drunk when they conceived me and they had been drunk for as long as I could remember. Even now, I could hear them shouting, and I prayed that they wouldn't take it out on me.

I knew my prayers made no difference though, and soon enough, I could hear them coming up the stairs.

There was a loud 'BANG!' as the door flung open. I covered my eyes as the first bit of light I had seen in days creeped through the door.

"GET UP!" My mother shouted; her voice wobbling and unclear. I didn't move, as I knew that I would not be able to stand. My father grabbed the front of my T-shirt and pulled me to my feet, as I let out a quiet yelp. Pain filled my body and I tried to stay awake; though I had little energy remaining in my body.

One blow was all it took to knock me out. They did this more frequently every week, some times worse than others. I hated it but there was nothing I could do to stop it; if there was a way, I would use it.

When I awoke, it was dark and cold, and I assumed that I had been unconscious for a few hours. As I became fully aware of my surroundings, I noticed that I was no longer in the old and dusty attic, and was in fact lying in a street.

The street was cold and empty, the concrete sharp under my hands as I pulled myself upright. It was dark and quite late at night, and one flickering streetlight was all that was visible for what seemed like miles. This made the setting a whole lot more eerie and creepy.

There were also drops dripping from my forehead from where I had been previously hit. This was once again consuming all of my energy as I fort to stay awake. With the little energy I had left, I managed to curl myself into a tight ball. This was just enough to keep the tiny amount of body heat in, as I sat helpless and alone in the middle of nowhere.

I heard footsteps coming towards me and I stayed silent hoping that they would pass. As they got louder, I hugged my legs tighter.

Suddenly, they stopped, and a voice asked "Are you okay?"

I ignored this in the hope that they would leave. I felt them bend down close to me and pull my arm away from my legs. "Why are you out here? Isn't it a bit late?"; she must have realised that I was just a child, judging by her kind and gently tone of voice.

I lifted my head up slightly and she must have noticed the blood dripping slowly from my head, as she pulled out a phone from her pocket. I heard her ask for an ambulance, and I gave her a look as if to say 'please, no...'. She replied in a whisper as she put her phone back and took hold of my hand, "It'll be okay..."

She smiled, and I just stared at the ground as my body started to shake and tears fell silently down my cheeks. My parents would never forgive me.

She saw that I was shaking, and placed her jacket around my shoulders. "What's your name darling?" She asked in a gentle voice. I didn't answer as I did not have the courage, and couldn't face anyone finding out about my life.

She sensed that I wasn't going to answer and added "I'm Jess, Jessica Harrison. I'm a nurse at Holby City ED and I'm going to get you sorted out, yeah?" She smiled and I couldn't help but feel slightly pleased that she had found me. Being with her made me feel protected and most of all safe; this was something I had never felt before, and I was glad that I could finally feel it.


	2. Adam

It wasn't long before the ambulance arrived. Its blue flashing lights were blinding and I had to squint so I could see who was coming.

A man and a woman jumped out of the vehicle as the lights stopped, and once again, the one streetlight was the only thing making anything else visible for miles. I was slightly scared by these new people- I shook and hid more as they got closer- but Jess just comforted me more.

She turned around slowly and looked at the paramedics who were just shutting the doors of the ambulance. "Jeff?" She shouted to one of them, who then turned to face her.  
"Jess? What happened? Are you alright?" He exclaimed as he ran over towards us, the woman following closely behind.  
"I'm fine!" She replied, "I just found her here on the way back from the ED, she won't tell me her name and she seems pretty shaken up. She's got a laceration to her head, but I haven't had a chance to look at it."  
He looked at me and then back at Jess. "Do you think...?" He whispered, so that I could not hear.  
Jess also looked back at me and then at the paramedic. "I don't know, but I don't think she's going to be telling us anytime soon..."

They nodded slightly at each other as the two paramedics knelt down next to me. "My name's Dixie and this is Jeff. Can you tell me your name please?" The female paramedic asked. I stayed silent, still not wanting anyone to know who I was. "Okay then," she continued after my silence, "how old are you?"

I said nothing.

"Come on princess, it would really help us if we knew who you are and what happened!" The male, Jeff, added.  
"Are you in any pain anywhere?" Jess questioned calmly. I shook my head shakily.  
"Do you think you can stand up?" Dixie asked; I nodded slowly. She moved around to the side of me and took hold of my arm, making me flinch in fear.  
"It's alright!" Jess whispered, and I relaxed slightly.

Jess took hold of my arms and helped me as I tried to stand up. I let out a quiet cry in pain as my body lifted off the floor. "Not much further." Jess reassured me as tears started silently rolling down my cheeks again.

She kept hold of me as I wobbled shakily towards the ambulance and into the back. Jeff and Dixie followed, then split as Dixie got into the driver's seat and Jeff climbed into the back with Jess and I.

I sat on the bed gingerly, keeping my head down and my mouth shut. Jeff shut the doors and grabbed some medical equipment. I flinched every time he tried to examine me or attach some sort of monitor, wary of these new people, and eventually he just gave up.

The route to the ED was short but bumpy and I felt sick as I was thrown about by potholes and rubble in and on the road.

We soon arrived and, once again, Jess took hold of my arms and assisted me as I walked slowly out of the ambulance and into a wheelchair waiting just outside.

Jess walked beside me as Jeff wheeled me into the busy ED. I was still keeping my head down, and my body covered, although I knew someone would eventually find out.

A tall man in green scrubs noticed us and jogged over. "What've we got, Jeff?" He asked in a deep, manly voice.  
"Unknown female, about 12 years of age." Jeff replied. "Found alone at the side of a road with a laceration to her forehead, seems pretty shaken up, but by what is unknown."  
"Okay, cubicles please."

Jeff wheeled me to a bed and watched as Jess helped me up and onto it. He smiled then walked away, taking the wheelchair with him.

"Hi my name is Dr Trueman; I'm a consultant here at the ED. Can you tell me what happened?" The dark-haired man asked.

As before, I didn't say or do anything. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Jess shake her head lightly and mouth something, which I was unable to make out.

A nurse walked over and pulled the curtains shut around the cubicle, as Adam sat down on the end of the bed. "Can I take a look at your head?" He asked in a quiet, calm voice. I lifted my head a little, as if to say 'yes'.

I flinched as he placed his fingers around the wound, "it's alright, shh, it okay..." He whispered. I clenched my eyes tight shut and allowed him to continue. I felt my hands shaking and, as before, Jess took hold of them. I held them tight, knowing that she wasn't going to do anything to hurt me.

Adam finished checking it and sat back. "Can you tell me how you got this?" He asked in a quiet, gentle voice. I thought about replying, making something up so that they wouldn't keep asking, but I kept quiet as I didn't want to lie.

"Okay," he continued, as he sensed that I wasn't going to answer, "well the wound isn't deep so it just needs cleaning and dressing." He looked over at Jess. "Are you staying?"  
She smiled, "Yeah, I'll go and get changed, then I'll come and dress it."  
"Someone needs to stay with her for now," Adam added, "so I'll wait here until you come back." They smiled at each other and Jess walked out of the cubicle.

I was still keeping my head down and avoiding making eye contact with anyone. Jess's jacket remained over my shoulders, and I used this to cover my arms and upper body, in order to avoid them asking more questions.

Adam was still sat on the end of the bed, looking me up and down, trying to work out what might have happened to me. "I will have to check you over once your head has been sorted, so is there anything you want to tell me now before I do?" He asked. I stayed silent, and he also knew that he would get no response.

Jess returned 10 minutes later with the equipment that she needed. Adam stood up as she walked in, smiling at her then looking back at me for a moment before returning to Jess. "I'll need to do a full examination once the wound has been dressed, so I'll be out here. Will you come and find me once you're done?" He asked Jess.  
"Sure!" She smiled as Adam left the cubicle, closing the curtains behind him.


	3. Scarred

There was complete silence between the two of us as Jess cleaned and dressed the wound on my head; she was unsure of what to say, and I just simply didn't want to say anything.

She finished and placed the equipment back into the small blue tray that she had brought them in. "I'll be back in a minute." She said quietly, as she also left the cubicle.

Once again, I was alone; and very scared. My head throbbed and my body ached, but I tried to hide it so that no one would find out; and my parents wouldn't hate me even more. I sat back and closed my eyes tight shut, hoping that it would all just end there and then; I wouldn't have to put up with the pain and misery any longer.

Thinking just made my head ache more, so I sat up back up and opened my eyes; I could just about hear Jess and Adam talking.

"Have you finished?" Adam asked.

"Yeah," she paused, "you know she's not going to let you anywhere near her..."

By 'she' I guessed that they meant me.

"She's going to have to!" He replied.

"Forcing her to do something is the last thing we need at the moment! She's needs someone who she trusts to do it..."

"Jess, she doesn't trust anyone!" He exclaimed.

"Maybe not, but she trusts me more than anyone else! So, why don't I check her over and then if I find anything I think needs looking at I'll come and tell you!" Jess replied

"Okay, fine," he began, "but if there's even the slightest thing wrong with her, I want to know about it!"

The talking stopped and I heard footsteps coming towards the cubicle. I hid myself again; although the chances of her not seeing the scars and bruises that covered my body were now shallow.

Jess walked back into the cubicle, shutting the curtain behind her. I kept looking at the bed, avoiding eye contact with her.

She perched on the end of the bed and placed her hand on top of my own. "Look," she began, "I need to check you over to make sure that you haven't got any more injuries. It won't take long, okay?"

I nodded slightly; I really didn't want her to see the scars and bruises covering my body, but I knew that I had no choice...

Jess stood up and walked around to the side of bed so that she was next to me. She took her jacket from my shoulders, placing it neatly onto the end of the bed.

I held my arms close to my body in hope that she wouldn't notice them, but currently, she was more interested in my neck...

It was covered in hand-shaped marks and bruises of all shapes and sizes from my Father grabbing me; pulling me up from the floor when I had little energy remaining in my body.

I felt her fingers pressing against the bruises. This brought back the memories in which these 'accidents' had occurred, and I let a single teardrop fall silently down my cheek.

Unfortunately, Jess noticed this; though luckily she stopped and moved onto another part of my battered and bruised body...

She looked at my body for a while; pressing the bruises, making me wince, and flinch in fear. I just hoped that she would forget to check my arms...

She didn't.

She could obviously see that I was trying to hide them.

Jess sat next to me on the bed, facing me, looking at me as if she knew what was coming next.

Slowly, she placed her hands on my arm; one on my hand, the other placed gently on my wrist.

I stared at the bed below me, closing my eyes every once in a while, allowing a single, silent teardrop to fall.

Calmly, she turned my arm over so that she could see the under-side of it.

I had no idea what she must have been thinking, as she stared at the bloodied and uneven skin covering my small, fragile arms.

I had no idea why I did this, but most of the time I just couldn't stop myself. Whenever my parents saw them, they only beat me more; they thought that I was trying to end my life, to make life hard for them...

It felt so good though; the way that it released all of the pain, and any energy that might still remain in my body. I did it rarely - most of the time I was in enough pain anyway - but when I did it, I dug deep.

I wanted to look up at Jess, to say I was sorry for all of the trouble that I had caused her; but I couldn't bare to look at her.

My cheeks were becoming red from the tear stains, my eyes burning, as I sat wondering what would happen next.

Jess was the first to look up.

She stared at me in a confused manner for a moment, before asking the question that I did not want to answer.

"Did you do this?" She asked quietly, referring to my scar ridden arms.

More tears.

There was a moment of complete silence before I did anything. I nodded slowly; Jess sighing as I did so.

"Why?" She questioned softly.

I wanted to tell her the truth about it all, maybe she would be able to help.

But I couldn't.

Gingerly, I shrugged my shoulders.

I desperately wanted her to know the truth; after all, she could be my way out of it all!

But she probably wouldn't believe me. She'd probably call psych, not that she wouldn't anyway after she'd seen the scars, and I'd end up in some mental institute somewhere.

But I didn't want that. I really didn't want that...


End file.
